Notes on the "Theory"

This is a set of notes--her responses to something I wrote. I'm not sure what the manuscript was--it must have been long because the numbers, I believe, refer to pages. I am guessing that the manuscript was something I wrote to follow up Womansearch, although it surprises me that I would have been doing this ten years before her book was published. I am reproducing her notes as they were--not leaving out the things that don't make sense without the original manuscript. She tells some stories and makes some important points in these notes. The notes are titled "THEORY" and dated August, 1992.

5. The issue here is HOW you refuse to hand over your personal authority in order to retain your personal power. It must be done from adult perspective, which makes you stand a positive rather than a negative equaling that of the illegitimate authority holder. The dynamics (intangible) inherent in such action presents you as an adult (not to be denied) rather than a child, on a level that penetrates through the protective defenses of the oppressor and touches his understanding. This knocks him off balance because it requires that he give you a measure of RESPECT.

Another issue here is WHEN you choose to initiate this adult action. Illegitimate authority-holders depend (of necessity) on generating and maintaining or increasing the "fear of loss" syndrome within the people whose authority they usurp. For many people, this fear is enough to keep them fastened in the seat of the Child Position, where they "earn" the disrespect alloted them as seen through the eyes of the oppressor. Children do not get respect. The best thing you can do is refuse at the beginning (adultly) to be pushed into the Child Position then like it or not you SHARE in the responsibility for the treatment you receive there. Respect is an earned thing--adult behavior is the key. Adults will take risks against the accepted standard (like blind or little kid obedience to crass authority) in order to keep self-respect while the "Child" might sooner choose to remain "safe" (NOT) in the bosom of the known terror than chance the unknown. Thus they allow fear to ROB them and bring them to the very end that they stayed Children to escape.

7. In discerning what one's needs truly are (as against one's desires and wants--MATURITY makes it possible. Remember that maturity is part of the Head that little kids don't have. The immature person is easily consumed with wants and desires that he identifies as needs. Maturity sets limits on oneself which a child is unable to do--therefore necessitating that someone else does it for him to save him from the consequences of overreach. You see, the alcoholic (and others) reside in the child mode, saying "I NEED 'nother drink" when actually it's that he wants another drink and does everything possible not to be denied what he WANTS--even to the point of destroying himself and others (drunk drivers).

25. Language: examples
Suppose instead of "When is an apology not an apology" we say "when is a compliment not a compliment" OR "when is a saintly act not a saintly act?" I have examples for those two right from memory. While I was married to S.O.B. [in her book, she refers to her abuser as "Saved Open-hearted Brother," abbreviated S.O.B.] I remember being given a beau-ti-fulllll peignoir set--the thing was absolutely luscious! I was so pleased it made me feel like a movie star and I sorely needed at the time to feel like an attractive appreciated woman instead of some kind of household drudge invisible to the naked eye. The set was the exact right color and cut for me. It showed me off to advantage. I dressed me in it and twirled before my children, who were astonished at how gorgeous I looked in it. They jumped up and down and clapped their hands in delight.

I became a Queen instantly. Me and the kids couldn't wait for S.O.B. to get home and see me--"Oh he's going to just DIE over you Mama," gushed my daughter. "Yeah Mom" said the boys, "You don't even look like yourself in that--man--you look really GOOD!" I added a dab of perfume behind my ears. We waited. "Here he is! Shush-shush!"

He walked in. Immediately, as his eyes took in all our expectant faces and slid over me from top to bottom--he stepped up to me, got right in my face, and like a cat full of cream purred softly, subtly, killing me AND my kids instantly--I mean we died in the moment--the breath stolen from our nostrils--our dead bodies spiraling down down down into hell--sent there by the master stroke of the compliment that was NOT a compliment: "Ummm, you sure smell good."

Then he walked away from our graves.

The other example (saintliness) is detailed in the book in the story called the confession. [In the book Womansearch].

26. You asked "what is technical?" Whoa boy--how to explain--Okay--the technical realm is the realm in which the human corruptions of authority/power positions EXIST and lay hidden. Remember the 3 Marriage Ceremony transparencies? In the natural realm we see the standard portrait (western world) of the Bride & Groom. Next--in the technical realm we see what's really going on--that is, the bride is really being beheaded not married! Technically through "marriage" the adult woman is reduced to the status of a child (no head).

Also, remember the origins--Adam and Eve? Remember that the true division of the status of people is Adults and Children, and that the male (Adam) was the occupant of the adult status simply through the technicality of having arrived first! And therefore technically, the female (Eve) occupied the status of Child since she came last? Without understanding we can read that and see only the natural realm--man and woman. And do you remember that after the Fall the Turnaround happened so that that which was before was no more because it reversed itself. That technically MAN died--and that the female did not share in his death even tho she shared in the other two deaths? And so technically Man is dead even tho he appears to walk the earth today? And that the collective undisciplined male egos answer to all this was to switch places? And that this is done chiefly thorgh "marriage" by technically killing woman by reducing her to forever child status by his hand as was his disgrace by the hand of God? Talk about kids passing it on--Boy takes the cake!

51. Did you ever see the movie "Caine Mutiny"? It relates to this issue.

56. Can we understand then or surmise that the term "illegitimate" authority PERSONIFIES the act of the patriarchy in its confiscation of female authority and that it is, in fact, MAN who is illegitimate?

80. Wrong. If in an adult/adult APR the person holding the authority Position in it recognizes the personal authority of the person holding the power Position, then the relationship is legitimate--BUT--it takes an adult to do that and there are few of them. Look at the military--it thrives on illegitimacy--cutting off the heads of people (the soldiers) in the power Position by the millions! The same in marriage--CHOP--off with her head! It is not the structure of an APR that causes illegitimacy but the actions of the individuals participating in it.

81. This takes some thought. I will return to it later.
82. YES! YES! YES!

85. Yes--this makes incredible sense. It also embodies the essence of the Mother.

86. The "laundry" bit is not suited here--it is too small an issue. The Ownership Principle is vastly broad--it deals with the overall widely basic issue of freedom of conscience--knowing right from wrong and the ability to refuse coercion that subjugates one's personal power--THEN all the small things (laundry, etc.) fall into place so you are able to discern the intricacies of them. More later.

87. ("the car??") No. The power here is NOT the car. The power here is the BODY. The HEAD was able to obtain the license. This example assumes the presence of the car already. The authority (head) to drive the car is no good if the Power (body) is incapacitated.

88. Please note here that this bit needs more work. Power is NOT self-sustaining in the real sense. Got to clear this up.

108. Yeah, me too. Too too too PROFOUND--it swallows me--feel like I'm not equal to the task. In asnwer to your question though about "reason" in the realms I'll say this: Boy is all enamored of his god, Reason. But what the revelation of realms shows us is how lacking reason is as a determiner of greater good. Human reasoning is limited by human understanding, and most of all--EGO. The science of reason's greatest flaw is the fact that it is incredibly limited and ignorant of it! Reason, by the very meaning of the term, can not allow itself beyond the human confine--and the ANSWERS that reason seeks and cannot find--are in that "beyond." The physical, psychological, & emotional--are the boundaries of what I term the Human Confine--the name reveals itself--we are confined. Our confinement is ruled by human nature, its rules serve self (a very human thing). We now say that scientific (human) reason serves self, and in doing so is not trustworthy, although many trust in it. It is without integrity, and without it, falls into the category of illusion. It betrays its name--being emotional while yet denying emotions, being physical while yet claiming freedom from such. In the final analysis, scientific "reasoning" is no more than the usual fare served from patriarchy's table--yet another game of Boy. Reason, or any other human element, is not a culprit by its existence--it just does not venture. Higher Reason (spiritual) does not affirm nor embrace illegitimate authority. Rather, it reveals it and by that revelation, indicts it. Scientific reasoning (human) seeks to legitimize the trespass. The Spiritual is our path OUT of the Confine. Reason (within the Confine) is partner with the technical realm by being the space in which the crossover from legitimate to illegitimate authority is "hidden."

O. You asked about the Childworld Chart. It's old, and I stopped work on it long ago and almost forgot it. If you still want it I'll get it for you--and then can remember to work on it some more--it's not ready the way it was left.